How Mothers Play a Role in Raising Sons Who Become Weak Men or Misogynists
A mother’s role in raising sons is tremendously important. Mothers are the first nurturers of boys. They teach them how to behave, how to regulate emotions, how to follow rules, and how to relate to women.
Long before a boy understands the outside world, he is learning from his mother what femininity looks like and how women should be treated.
A mother is the first female relationship a man ever experiences. That relationship leaves a deep imprint and often shapes how he later interacts with women as a husband, a leader, and a member of society.
As boys grow older, fathers play a larger role in turning boys into men. But in the early years, mothers are very much at the forefront. This stage cannot be underestimated or rushed through.
The value of nurturing boys properly is not emphasized enough today. If you observe households where sons grow into weak men or men who harbor resentment and misogyny toward women, you will often notice recurring patterns in the mother–son dynamic.
Mothers play a part in raising sons who later become weak men or misogynists when:
When mothers favor their sons over their daughters and spoil them, excusing them from responsibility and discipline, sons grow up helpless and entitled. They learn that women exist to serve them and clean up after them, not to be respected before Allah SWT.
When mothers position themselves as victims and emotionally rely on their sons as saviors, confidants, or therapists, boys are burdened with emotional roles they were never meant to carry. Sons raised this way often struggle to form healthy marriages because they feel torn between emotional loyalty to their mothers and responsibility to their wives.
When mothers insist on controlling who their sons marry to fulfill their own desires, rather than considering compatibility, readiness, and Islamic principles, marriages begin with resentment instead of maturity.
When mothers place their sons on pedestals and excuse poor character, bad habits, addictions, or laziness because “my son can do no wrong,” sons never learn accountability. A man who is never corrected becomes a man who resents correction.
When mothers emotionally blackmail their sons into choosing them over their wives, they sow conflict within marriages. Sons grow confused about loyalty, rights, and Islamic boundaries, often resulting in marital instability.
When mothers raise sons to believe success is defined only by money, status, looks, or career, while neglecting to teach them about the life of the Prophet SAW, taqwa, adab, haya, and akhlaq, boys grow into men who lack moral grounding.
When mothers rely on Islamic schools or madrassas to “fix” their sons’ behavior while remaining disengaged themselves, discipline collapses. Neglecting to monitor what sons consume online or on their devices leaves them vulnerable to harmful ideologies and distorted views of women.
When mothers constantly criticize or belittle their husbands in front of their sons, the father–son bond is weakened. This damages a boy’s understanding of male leadership and authority, which is essential for developing confident and balanced men.
This post is not written to bash mothers. It is written to raise awareness.
These patterns are occurring across many cultures, and they are negatively impacting families, marriages, and communities. Mothers have enormous influence over how boys grow into men, how they view women, and how they show up as husbands.
Fathers are essential in shaping men, but mothers build boys. When boys are not properly nurtured, disciplined, and grounded in Islam from early on, character issues almost always follow.
If you enjoyed this post, you may also like reading How Fathers Play a Role in Raising Sons Who Become Weak Men or Misogynists
Salam, I’m Zakeeya!
I believe our homes are meant to be havens of sakina—places where families feel safe, nurtured, and loved. Since 2011, I’ve been dedicated to helping Muslim women find tranquility in their roles, care for themselves with dignity, and achieve inner peace. Drawing on my years of experience as a wife, mother, and mentor, I share tools and guidance to help you face life’s challenges with more gratitude and mindfulness. Here, you’ll find Muslima, wifehood, motherhood, and lifestyle insights to make your journey as a woman more fulfilling, inshallah. Read more about me here.
